OUT OF CONTROL AND OUT OF OPTIONS

You may or may not have seen my Facebook post yesterday. In it, I talked about the recent car accident I was in that totaled my family's one vehicle. I was not at fault, and the other driver has been very hard to reach. Even tougher, has been getting a hold of her insurance company to find out how to obtain a rental car. In this whole mess, I've been struggling with a complete loss of control over the situation. I can't get my husband to work, my son to school, or myself to various doctor appointments this week. It's very frustrating and I don't like the feeling of not being in control. In the process of all this, I'm reminded of Job from the Bible. 

I was T-Boned, and her car pushed me 20+ feet
back into the turn lane. The front end of her car
was inside my front end. My tie rods snapped 
and were broken, hood and bumper crunched.

Job never needed answers from God. He thought he did, so when he got the chance to confront God, he asked Him many things. God didn't give Job answers, because they wouldn't have helped. What Job needed, he received. Job needed faith to trust that all he went through served a bigger purpose. In the end, Job was rewarded for his faithfulness and Satan left him alone.

In life, we face many trials that don't seem to make a whole lot of sense at the time. We cry, we pray, we plead with God for answers. Sometimes things just seem so damn unfair! There is an entire battle going on in the spiritual realm that we can't see and often know absolutely nothing about. God knows. Like Job, we need more faith to trust that all the trials and tribulations we go through are for a purpose far bigger than we are able to comprehend.

It makes no sense to me that Saul became Paul just to be persecuted all the days of his ministerial life. Paul did all that God asked, even when he knew he was going to be harmed in the process. That's true faithfulness, isn't it? So why didn't we see Paul receive his reward here on earth like Job did?

Though I am free and belong to no one, I have made myself a slave to everyone, to win as many as possible.  To the Jews I became like a Jew, to win the Jews. To those under the law I became like one under the law (though I myself am not under the law), so as to win those under the law.  To those not having the law I became like one not having the law (though I am not free from God’s law but am under Christ’s law), so as to win those not having the law. To the weak I became weak, to win the weak. I have become all things to all people so that by all possible means I might save some.  I do all this for the sake of the gospel, that I may share in its blessings.

+1 Corinthians 9:19-27 (NIV)

Paul's treasures were never here on earth. They resided in Heaven, which is why he gave up his entire life, willingly, to secure his treasure in Heaven and encouraged others to do the same. His life is a gift and a treasure to us all. We can reap wisdom from his efforts still to this day. We can draw strength from his example. Jesus was Paul's strength. Paul, a mere man, was often weak and placed in situations where he was absolutely not in control. Yet he prospered in nearly all that he did, because he had faith and relied on God to provide all that he needed. No matter how many times Paul was knocked down, he got back up again.  (the link attached is my attempt at humor. I'm a child of the 90's. 😉 )

As I pursue the other driver's insurance company to pay what they owe and help my family get back on our feet, I simply have to trust God to fill in the gaps where I'm absolutely unable to do more than I already have. I can call the insurance agent again and again. I can plead my case, provide documentation, follow through, and keep praying about the situation, and that's about it right now. It's out of my hands. I was never in control from the moment the other driver disobeyed traffic rules and hit me, to this moment right now, where I'm waiting, waiting, waiting for results. 

Everything seems unfair. I've been playing back the sequence of events of that night, starting from the moment I left my driveway, over and over in my head. There wasn't anything I could change on my end without knowing the ultimate result ahead of time, which is impossible.  The only explanation I can come up with is that this has always been in God's hands and I simply have to trust Him. When I start to sin and become frustrated because I'm not in control, I have to go back to Him and plead for more faith. This is a test, maybe. What I do know for sure is that this entire trial serves a purpose far bigger than I'm capable of ever understanding. To God be the glory. May my actions in this time of waiting and figuring things out, glorify His Holy Name.Amen.

Stay tuned for another episode. See you next time! And remember, if you or a loved one is in danger, get help immediately, and don't stop talking until someone acts on your words.

National Domestic Abuse Hotline: 800-799-7233 Hours: 24/7. Languages: English, Spanish, and 200+ through interpretation service. SMS: Text START to 88788

National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673 Hours: Available 24 hours. https://www.rainn.org/

988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline Hours: Available 24 hours. Languages: English, Spanish. https://988lifeline.org/

In Christ alone our hope is found

Run, don't walk for help! You're worth it.