Pulled Into Letting Go

Wednesday, January 18, 2023

FORGIVENESS IS NEVER FOR THEM

Happy Hump Day! We've made it to the halfway point in the week, folks. For some of us, that's a great accomplishment, and celebrating that is okay. Sometimes we have to take life minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day. When our heart is broken, when we're ill, when we're in the midst of conflict, life is infinitely more difficult, isn't it? So go easy on yourself today. Celebrate the small wins. It's not silly. It's survival.

This morning I have kept busy so far by folding what I like to refer to as "Mount Washmore" - a pile of laundry so big it was falling off my six-foot couch. It only two days to get that big. I still have more laundry to wash, dry, fold, and put away. To be fair, a fair amount of the size was due to blankets, towels, and bulky clothing like jeans and sweats, but I digress. It kept me busy for a good hour and a half. Next, I'm tackling kitchen organization and decluttering. Fun.

As I'm keeping busy keeping my home, I'm also utilizing mundane tasks to think deeply about the past, present, and future. I'm a strong believer that history repeats itself and we need to learn from the past in order to move forward successfully in a healthy manner. We can't stuff the problems of the past in a closet and walk away. They have to be dealt with.

One issue I've been thinking a lot about is forgiveness. That pesky word keeps popping up. There is always a need for forgiveness. We are all sinners and even if we're not the ones doling out forgiveness, we're still dealing with it in some way. Personally, I'm prone to holding grudges. There is a gal from High School I have enjoyed disliking for 25 years. How petty is that? It's even uglier to see it written out like this. It's time for me to forgive and fully let it go.

What about all the big stuff? How do we forgive that? I have a simple answer, but it requires faith, trust, and work. You ready? Jesus. Jesus is the simple answer. Consider His ultimate sacrifice for us and our sins. He was totally blameless, yet took on all the punishment for our sins. We are to be like Jesus, so you do the math. We must forgive.

Forgiveness is a daily choice for me, and sometimes hourly. When I'm really focusing on forgiveness, I have to take it minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day, and be very intentional about guarding and leading my heart. Sometimes I have to find a quiet place and sit with big feelings, talking things out with God. Often, I have to spend an extended amount of time in the Word, allowing the Holy Spirit to work within me, convicting me of sin, and prompting me to repent.

Sitting with big feelings can be really scary and it takes a lot of practice. Don't try to go it alone. Invite God to sit with you through them, and don't be shy about talking to Him as you work through things. If you feel silly or unable to talk, then write Him a letter. It's okay if you can't or don't finish. The point is to start. You will thank yourself later for this.

Christian therapy can really help as well. I don't recommend secular talk therapy for the most part. It can be helpful, but if the therapist isn't willing to allow your religion into the mix, it's going to backfire and cause more issues later on down the line. Unfortunately, I know from experience. I had a therapist once tell me to stop talking about God because "He's a myth" and talking about it made her uncomfortable. Another time, I had a psychiatrist tell me that Christianity is the basis for all mental health issues and outright refused to treat me. He then went on to tote the "positive" aspects of Buddhism.

Your Pastor is an excellent resource for locating help. If he is unable to direct you to a licensed Christian counselor, often he will know of someone who can. Many Pastors meet regularly with the other Pastors in their area to encourage each other and to ask for help with resources their congregants need. Don't be afraid to reach out and ask for help when needed. At the very least, your Pastor will likely commit to pray for you and that's a huge relief in and of itself. Prayer is both the least and the most we can do for others.

Remember, you can do hard things. So can I. We can do them together and we can do them with Jesus, but we cannot complete them alone. Jesus is the simple answer to all of our issues, all of our problems, and all of our questions.

Keep Moving Forward

Stay tuned for another episode. See you next time! And remember, if you or a loved one is in danger, get help immediately, and don't stop talking until someone acts on your words.

National Domestic Abuse Hotline: 800-799-7233 Hours: 24/7. Languages: English, Spanish, and 200+ through interpretation service. SMS: Text START to 88788

National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673 Hours: Available 24 hours. https://www.rainn.org/

988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline Hours: Available 24 hours. Languages: English, Spanish. https://988lifeline.org/

In Christ alone our hope is found

Run, don't walk for help! You're worth it.

Friday, January 13, 2023

STEPPING HEAVENWARD

Well, we've made it to the second week of 2023 now. How are y'all doing? I'm having a hard time with the weather in my neck of the woods. It's cold and rainy every day. I feel like I'm back in Everett, WA again and I've been craving some crappy Starbucks coffee. Oof. I'd better stay away from it, though. It's more like Five Bucks and never worth the calories or the money.

In terms of New Year's goals, I've been a bit lax on them. I spent a big chunk of last week and the beginning of this week with my right foot propped up due to plantar fasciitis. It was not fun, and for someone with a goal-oriented personality, it was very difficult. As far as getting into a Bible study routine, I have surpassed my goal - so far. I can't get cocky, though. This is the slow season. Time to keep plugging away!

Last week, I really struggled with an old issue - pride, jealousy, and unforgiveness. All toward one person in particular. I put out a call to prayer to some friends from church and asked that they join me in prayer. I was deep in sin and I wanted out ASAP! Two days later, I had a breakdown which lead to a breakthrough. I needed to stop looking at the sins of the other person so much and start praying for God to soften my heart so I can forgive them.

Shortly after becoming a Christian, I was lent a book by my Pastor's wife. It's called Stepping Heavenward by Elizabeth Prentiss. I used to read it at least once a year. It's one of those books that is rife with wisdom that cuts right to your soul and convicts you, gently. One of my favorite parts of the book is when her father-in-law passes away and she's saddened by it. She says she wishes she had spent more time simply loving him, instead of trying to work out why he was so cruel to her. That part always convicts me. When you read the book, I hope it touches you as well.

People will always be cruel. We're human. We hurt. We get jealous. We get tired and cranky. Sometimes we get hangry. Hurt people hurt people and misery loves company. Sometimes we simply do things because we're weak in the spirit and that makes us more susceptible to believing the lies that Satan whispers into our ears. We have to learn to turn away from the lies and turn toward Christ. We can do that by developing a strong relationship with Christ through

Daily time in the Word
Attending church weekly
Prayer without ceasing - when we're happy, sad, mad, grateful, depressed, scared, in need...
Going to Him as a child would and trusting Him to provide all that we need
Fellowship with other believers
Being doers of the Word and not merely hearers
Sitting with God and working through big feelings and hard choices

If you're a parent, think about all the times your child comes to you and what their intent is when they do so. Now repeat that with Jesus in your own life. That's exactly what that relationship is supposed to look like. God is a God of absolutes. Remember - He never leaves us, never forsakes us, and always loves us. You can trust Him.

Go to Jesus like a little child