Pulled Into Letting Go

Wednesday, November 2, 2022

THE NAKED TRUTH

Pornography and sexual abuse generally go hand in hand. As a child, I was subjected to pornography and had it readily available to me almost at all times. The urge to look at it became nearly impossible to ignore, and I succumbed to the sin of lust at a very young age. The invention and progression of the internet made viewing porn even easier. In the early to mid '90s there weren't the same protections for kids on the internet. Looking at pornography was as easy as logging into Yahoo! chat rooms and saying "hello" to a complete stranger. Sex was everywhere, all the time.

Child pornography was a new concept to me, and I have always been disgusted by the idea of it. It's as vile to me as the flashbacks of my own abuse. I don't understand it. I don't ever want to see it. I have never seen it. Thank God. I wish I had never seen even one pornographic image in my life. They're extremely difficult to forget. Something about sin burns itself into my brain and I have a hard time shaking it permanently. That's where God comes in.

Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. -Galatians 5:19-24 (ESV)

God can and will deliver us from temptation and cleanse our hearts and minds when we ask Him to. Especially when we are doing so to please Him and live according to His Word.

Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect. -Romans 12:2 (ESV)

When I accept that God has a better plan for my life, then I can make better choices. Thankfully, I did save myself for marriage, as much as was in my own power to do so (abuse aside). In doing so, I opened up the blessings and joy that is uniting with one partner that I will be with for the rest of my life. The first few months of marriage were so sweet, and I will always look back on them with fondness.

If you've partaken in the sin of pornography, first of all, I want you to know that you're not alone. Secondly, you should know that you're never too far down the path of darkness to turn around and run back to the arms of God. He's not mad at you. He's saddened by your choices because they're not His best plan for you, but He isn't angry or unwilling to work with you to turn things around. Third, there isn't any such thing as "too far gone" to be saved. Read Luke 15:11-32. Perhaps that will help change your perspective?

A book I want to recommend to everyone who is tempted by the sin of pornography or even adultery is Free Indeed: Who The Son Sets Free by Jeremiah Weiland. In it, Jeremiah points us back to the Gospel, back to God's Word, and the initial intent behind the creation of sex. It's a fantastic book and I cannot say enough good things about Jeremiah or this book.

Stay tuned for another episode. I aim to crank out the blog posts three times a week on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. See you next time! And remember, if you or a loved one is in danger, get help immediately, and don't stop talking until someone acts on your words.

National Domestic Abuse Hotline: 800-799-7233 Hours: 24/7. Languages: English, Spanish, and 200+ through interpretation service. SMS: Text START to 88788

National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673 Hours: Available 24 hours. https://www.rainn.org/

988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline Hours: Available 24 hours. Languages: English, Spanish. https://988lifeline.org/

In Christ alone our hope is found

Run, don't walk for help! You're worth it.

Monday, October 31, 2022

RESENT & BE BITTER

Do you find it hard to be nice to people? I do. I find it hard to trust that what people are saying is true, as well. Even when faced with facts, I still tend to look for the cracks in whatever statement folks make. I've been lied to so much that it's almost second nature to discount every word most folks say. Is that God-honoring? No, it's not. It's something I'm continually in need of working on.

There's a group of women at my son's preschool who talk amongst themselves at pickup and drop-off. They seem to be friends, or at least know each other from somewhere else. From day one, it's made me very jealous. I'm new to this town and don't know many people. Despite my repeated attempts to locate a friend group, I've been largely unsuccessful. Sure, there are a lot of folks with whom I'm friendly and talk weekly, especially at church, but I've not found anyone yet with whom I can regularly discuss life events or attend events with. It's sad and lonely and I've allowed this fact to make me bitter, instead of better.

God knows my heart. He knows yours, too. He knows all the struggles we have had, are having, and will ever have and He has spoken about them at great length. There is a message within scripture for every situation, and every season we will go through in life.

See to it that no one falls short of God’s grace; that no root of resentment springs up and causes trouble, and by it many be defiled; - Hebrews 12:15 (AMP)

This piece of scripture has caused me so much grief over the last few months. It's like a lance in a boil. It's annoying and painful, but purposeful. If I remove the lance, I'll fester up and become septic, allowing the infection to spread to other areas. But if I allow the lance to drain the infection - the bitterness within me so that Jesus can clean my heart and make it new, I will be healed. Is this a gross description of sin? Yes. As well it should be. Sin is disgusting and it only harms us from the inside out. We have to drain it. Remove it. Extract it. Expose it to the Light.

Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man has great power to prevail. -James 5:16 (BSB)

So often, we want to try to hide away the parts of ourselves that are not pretty or pleasing to others. Like Adam and Eve, we try to strategically place fig leaves to hide our nakedness from God and from each other. God has already made it clear that He's not mad at us. He understands our sins and He wants us to come to Him so that we can receive His love and in that glow of His love and mercy, make new and better choices. When we sin, we hurt ourselves and we separate ourselves from God's love. That's not what is best for us and God knows that. That's why He sent Jesus to not only atone for our sins but to assure us that we are deeply, profoundly, and eternally loved.

When we accept the fact that God loves us and wants the absolute best for us, then we are able to open our eyes to even more truth and opportunity for growth. Consider the words in Mark 10:15 "Truly I tell you, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it." Why do you think God said that? What do children do that adults tend not to do? When you let the answer to those questions resonate within your heart for a while and really ruminate on them, you'll begin to recognize the changes you need to make in your own life. I know that I'm personally going to sit with these big feelings and ruminate on that today as well.